time crisis

well,its hard to remain optimistic and to be cheerful ...my grandpa is hospitalised for the 4th week,which is 1 full month.He isn't getting any better.Which in turn,worsen.I knew he is in excrutiating pain....groaning in pain,bearing the pain,living in pain.He is still running a high fever for the 6th day.......His face is pale,blood pressure is much too low.A normal person blood bressure should be above 100 but his is only 60+....today,when he went for dialysis,something cropped up again.his blood pressure dropped even lower to 50+......immediately,the nurses stopped the dialysis session and the doctor quickly examine him.His condition is still a mystery.The doctors have no inkling about his illness.It is referred as a unique case.His body is attacked by unknown viruses.We are told to prepare for the worst.Watching my grandpa suffering is unbearable.I doubt he can hold on any longer....it's just a matter of time......He needed special bed too because due to lack of movements and lying on the bed for too long,his butt is itchy and redden...a spacious mattress which cost $10 more than the usual one per day.When he heard of it,he is even more depressed.He feels that he is a burden to us......definitely not!

For the year end examinations,i scored quite well which is quite comforting......6As and 1Bs......class position is 4 and level position is 7...im contented.

~end~

2008 coming to an end soon!

my apologies guys for not updating my blog so often....boring eh?haha...but please bear with it...

well,so much had happened in such a short period of time..one of my relatives went to america with her son to reunite with her husband,my grandpa was hospitalised for almost 3 weeks,end of year examinations[finally came to an end] and tensions between my parents grew so strong because of my maid.

The thing that really worries and bugs me is my grandpa health...his health is deteriorating..just whenever the doctor signal us the greenlight,new illnesses will soon attack his body...making him real sick....for 3 weeks,he had been lying on the sick bay,unable to get up,in the ICU[intensive care unit].He had 2 major operations and luckily,all went smoothly.Now,he is admitted to normal ward which is a ''c'' class ward but its only for the time being.He still needs special attention as his illness might take a toll on his health once again.My family had decided that once he is discharged,we will hold his 75th birthday party.We are not taking risk by waiting for his actual birth date.We will hold a grand birthday party for him,celebrates his birthday in such a way that he will remembers it for life.well,i sounded quite pessimistic right?But still,i will hope for miracle.Pray everyday,hoping he will recover and be as fit as a fiddle,in pink health.Watching him suffering is painful for me.He humours me too despite of his health by pulling funny faces to make me laugh.He promised that he will get well so that i could attend his birthday party because i missed his 74th birthday party as i was in for council camp.Im SURE he WILL pull through this obstacle!A-gong jia you!add oil!haha......

NEXT,eoy examinations had finally come to an end!i hope its a good end!I have work hard and hope my effort had not gone down the drain.Hope to score with flying colours.

LASTLY,my parents strained relationship will improve further!It hurts me to listen to their hurtful remarks about each other.They exchange harsh words which often mortifies me.It makes it even less tolerable when they ask me to justify who is at a larger fault and pose questions that are even harder then exam papers.I often kept my mouth shut when it comes to judgemental qns......my mom is already unhappy with me in quite a few aspects and if i ......then wouldn't it makes matter worse?she does'nt like me though she denies...its clear that she adores my sis more and i never take it at my stride.....i've long gotten use to it....she thinks im a 'traitor' by being close to my relatives because she has some grudges with them which are adult problems....i don's think and will not allow their problems to affects whom i go along with.Its this attitude that she doesn't like and i won't change....i will stick to my status quo.If my parents are going to rank the five of us according to who they love most,i would definitely get the last placing..i always knew that.......ok,sorry guys for telling u all my unhappiness.im just trying to get it off my chest.....i feel better now!'thanks for reading...

~END~

UPDATE!

WELL,TIREDNESS is really killing me!busying with this and that...but kinda fun though!haha
achievements for this term!
1.good performance at the glass gallery[drama][5 performances on that day]
2.opss so you think you can dance champion team
3.consolation prize[only 10 cp to be given out] for the reading club competition

For the reading club competition,there were many conflicts going on...of course is not between teammates but with the lin lao tai!so many amendments and changes of designs to be made because of her...everybody's schedule is so tight yet she dint bother to go along with our schedules but hers...and i was scolded harshely by her because i could'nt hand in the chinese letter-writing on time![defence:there was glass gallery performance on that day and the drama members were under early releasement order!she gave us the work 10 mins before i left and expect me to hand in by that day!it was so ridiculous,right?i came back to school at 9p.m.++]

i was really slogging my guts for the reading club comp.i design the whole concepts ,instruct ppl on wad to do[most challenging job],buy this and that,being scolded for this and that...but luckily in the team there are some nice ppl too who stand by me!!they are
1.anna[make plasicine figurines]
2.jia min[cutting,painting,colouring]
3.melissa[do everything with me!thanks!]
4.shuxin[colouring,going out buying stuffs]
5.wei chou[drawing,going out buying stuffs]
6.kong ming[wimpish,petty![50 cents only]haha..jkjk...helping out here and there
7.cho hung[helping out with alot of stuffs]
8.shaun[help out in everything!]
THANKS everyone!



i really pray and hope that i can really rest well for the next few weeks!let me get recharged fully first before any big event comes by...please god!

term 3 is coming to an end in 1 more week...term 4 approaching!exams are nearer!more homeworks awaiting!stress are increasing!time for sleeping are decreasing!

tian!jia you!haha....

well,overall,this term is definitely a tiring,laborious and weary term for me...sad moments are much more than happy moments....my mood thus swings easily ...sorry friends if i am abit too harsh and cold towards u gals sometimes previously..i was really under stress by someone and almost falling to depression....but i can talk to no one.[i really don dare to trust anyone[friend] anymore.the word 'friend' to me is getting scarier.it was like a monster,a curse...everytime i try to overcome it by trusting friends,they will either betray or abandon me when they have other friends.it was painful to be forgotten and ditch by ppl who u think is friend...therefore,im used to being alone,working slolely alone,looking and responding coldly to ppl.......even if i say,there is no solution to it so i kept it to myself....but i really appreciate your encouragements....it was warmth and soothing to hear...gave me a little strength to defeat my depression....but best remedy for me is to be alone...and probably enclose myself.nut i will heal my wound myself reaL effective and u will see a happy and smiley tian in no time!

~end~

Back to blog again....haha..

moron!

yo!

can it be reversed?

Yesterday, i just blogged about winning the competition.But just now not long ago,i just read li jun 's blog and one of the post directed at us.It was heart-wrenching though......Last year,when we trained for high school musical dance with bevan,it was so fun being together!But now, everything changed.The 6 of us went separate ways....and we even competed in the so you think u can dance competition....It wasn't supposed to be like this.....Initially,I thought of asking back all of you girls back to form a team again to participate in that competition but we doesn't seem to be together ...we,the 2 teams,seem to be at loggerheads with each other.Idon't wish it to turn out like this....i really enjoy those time we spent as together as a team...to dance as a team,to have fun as a team,to have each other in a team.I miss all that trainings together........can it be reverse ?Dancing with you girls last year made me realise that dancing can be so fun!you gals really can dance!i felt so fortunate dancing with you gals although i always feel that we are from different world apart from dancing...because you all are so close,so girlish[unlike me,so manly]and so happening among you gals that i felt so distant .........you gals and i aren't close,and i do envy u all....

i remembered very clearly that when we won the high school musical,we were so astonished and excited....we held hands together,hugged each other....it meant that our effort had finally paid off.....as a team......bit when we lost the anti drug competition,we were so disappointed as a team but we regain as a team too....but now,our once great rapport,friendship and team spirit was tarnished...........we were'nt a team anymore.....we seemed much more like an enemy,rival......hatred arises so easily and deep animosity too....

What happened in the dance studio,we are really sorry....It was just meant as a joke....nothing!let's not slander each other anymore.....-_-


~END~